When Narcissism Comes to Church: Healing Your Community From Emotional and Spiritual Abuse
Christian Book Award® program
Outreach Resource of the Year
Why does narcissism seem to thrive in our churches?
We've seen the news stories. Maybe we ourselves have been hurt by a narcissistic church leader. But what is narcissism, really? And how does it infiltrate the church?
Chuck DeGroat has been counseling pastors with narcissistic personality disorder, as well as those wounded by narcissistic leaders and systems, for over twenty years. He knows firsthand the devastation narcissism leaves in its wake and how insidious and painful it is. In When Narcissism Comes to Church, DeGroat takes a close look at narcissism, not only in ministry leaders but also in church systems. He offers compassion and hope for those affected by its destructive power and imparts wise counsel for churches looking to heal from its systemic effects.
DeGroat also offers hope for narcissists themselves—not by any shortcut, but by the long, slow road of genuine recovery through repentance and trust in the gospel of Jesus.
Foreword by Richard Mouw
Introduction
1. When Narcissism Comes to Church
2. Understanding Narcissism
3. The Nine Faces of Narcissism
4. Characteristics of the Narcissistic Pastor
5. The Inner Life of a Narcissistic Pastor
6. Understanding Narcissistic Systems
7. The Gaslight Is On: Spiritual and Emotional Abuse
8. Healing Ourselves, Healing the Church
9. Transformation for Narcissists (Is Possible)
Epilogue: He Humbled Himself . . .
Acknowledgments
Appendix: Engaging the Nine Faces of Narcissism—Strategies for Therapists, Pastors, and Friends Who Care
Notes
"For far too long the evangelical church in America has nurtured and supported narcissism in our leadership. The addiction to platforms, influence, new ideas, as well as unbiblical definitions of leadership, authority, and power has sustained a structure that dehumanizes our leaders and exploits God's people. When Narcissism Comes to Church is an important book in a season when we must ask deeper questions of the very structure, metrics, motivations, and means to the work we set out to do in the name of Christ. Dr. DeGroat does not merely point a finger at narcissistic leaders, but asks us to consider these individuals in our church as fruit of a more fundamental problem in the American church. May we have ears to hear, humility to repent, and courage to respond."
"In the work of the soul, we name things to tame things. And there is nothing that is more in need of taming than the rampant narcissism that is not just a part of our cultural landscape but is hiding in plain sight in my own life. With When Narcissism Comes to Church, Chuck DeGroat unflinchingly names the subject for the leviathan it is, while offering hope in real, embodied stories of redemption. Comprehensive in scope, accessible in application, and generously kind in spirit, this book will provide pastor and laity alike the wisdom and courage that is necessary for the healing and recommissioning of the church's soul for years to come."
"A book on this topic is desperately needed right now. But more than that, we need a deeply thoughtful treatise on this subject that also points a healthy way forward. This is that book. Every one of us can learn something from Chuck's words, but more importantly we can gain the courage needed to face this destructive force in our churches."
"When Narcissism Comes to Church excellently articulates God's gracious call to come back to the way, the truth, and the life. Through experience and with expertise, Chuck DeGroat guides us through the darkness of our self-obsessed culture. The light of this book helpfully exposes sickness that exists in much of our church leadership. May God use this work to lead us to repentance."
"Reading this book, you begin to realize that DeGroat's work and diagnosis come from years of having his stethoscope on the church's pulse. He proves to be a seasoned churchman—understanding and working within churches, seminaries, denominations, and networks—but also a competent spiritual director in leading us toward healing."
Product Details
- Title : When Narcissism Comes to Church: Healing Your Community From Emotional and Spiritual Abuse
- Authors:
- DeGroat, Chuck
- Mouw, Richard J.
- Publisher: IVP
- Publication Date: 2020
- ISBN: 9780830841998
Chuck DeGroat (LPC, PhD) is professor of pastoral care and Christian spirituality at Western Theological Seminary in Holland, Michigan, and senior fellow at Newbigin House of Studies in San Francisco. He served as a pastor at churches in Orlando and San Francisco and founded two church-based counseling centers. He is a licensed therapist, spiritual director, and the author of Toughest People to Love and Wholeheartedness.